I became a stay at home mom as soon as my first child was born. It was a huge adjustment, going from working full time and not having any children to suddenly being home all day every day with my first baby! Not to mention, it was in the middle of a pandemic, which caused me to feel extra isolated.
Transitioning into a stay at home mom role definitely isn’t easy. There will be days where you struggle, but there’s going to be great days where you thrive as well! I’ll share some of the tips I have learned along the way with how I began to thrive being a stay at home mama.
Get dressed/ ready every day
As soon as you get up for the day, go get dressed! You don’t have to put on a fancy outfit, you could literally just throw on comfy pants and a t-shirt. Just the action of changing out of your pjs will help you get into the mindset of starting a new day and become more productive.
If you can swing it, I would even suggest doing your hair and makeup for a mood booster!
When I first became a stay at home mom, I was guilty of wearing my pjs all day long. This caused me to feel like lounging and laying around all day which in turn made me cranky and begin to feel negatively about myself. Once I started actually getting ready for the day my whole attitude changed.
Get enough sleep!
I cannot stress this one enough!! The better the sleep schedule, the better your days will be! You don’t want to be groggy and half awake all day long because you stayed up until midnight binge watching Netflix. You’ll be able to give your children more attention and focus on your daily tasks when fully rested.
Of course, this tip is difficult to do when having a baby that doesn’t sleep well at night. Even so, do the best you can to get to bed at a decent time.
I’m definitely guilty of staying up way too late and struggling the next day. When I finally started going to bed earlier I realized how much better I felt!
Set an alarm for the mornings
Waking up before your children wake up would be best, but if you’re anything like me and you are just not a morning person AT ALL then it may be kind of impossible to do this regularly. So, I make sure to at least set an alarm for about the time my toddler begins to wake up. That way, we can each have a little time to ourselves to fully wake up and be ready for the day.
Thankfully, he’s usually pretty patient waiting for me to come stumbling to his room.
Keep as consistent of a routine as you can
It’s no secret that children thrive on a schedule, but parents can thrive when we’re on one too! It can be tricky to come up with a consistent schedule. You can start by breaking your day into different parts (example: morning, lunch, naptime, afternoon, evening, bedtime). Focus on making an easy routine for each section of your day. It will become a habit once you stick to it every day.
Every family’s routine will be different. Try not to mold your routine to fit another family’s schedule. Experiment and see what works for you!
An example of my morning routine is as follows (of course this will be changing once our second baby makes their grand debut)-
6:30-7:30 wake up, get dogs ready for the day, independent play
7:30-8:30 breakfast, brush teeth, get dressed
8:30-9:30 independent play or help mom with some cleaning
9:30-10:00 snack time
10:00-11:00 playtime with mom
11:00-12:00 lunch time
Change your scenery when you can
Simply stepping outside with your little one for a short time during the day, can change your whole attitude, as well as your little’s attitude too! If you can’t get outside try running some errands or going to an indoor playground.
If getting out of the house is not an option you could simply play with your child in a different room!
I find that my toddler has less meltdowns throughout the day if he gets some outside time.
Some days my son seems to get bored of his surroundings in the living room (which is where we usually hang out during the day). When that happens I will bring him upstairs and suddenly he finds all sorts of new things to play with.
Aim to do one load of laundry every day
Laundry piles up FAST with little ones. Aim to wash, fold, and put away one load of laundry a day to help keep it under control.
Trust me, you’ll thank me for this later.
Stick to doing one load daily, so you don’t overdo it one day and end up with way too many baskets of clean laundry that needs to be put away. Hello laundry burnout!
Set time aside for YOU every day. Also… set time aside for your spouse every day
It can be easy to get stuck into focusing on the needs of everyone else’s but your own when you’re the main caregiver during the work week. Be sure to take some time out of each day to do something you enjoy to do that is solely for YOU. This also means taking time to focus on some self care. (Check out this post for some great self care ideas).
It’s also essential to set time aside for your partner every day too. Doing something together every day is a great way to keep connected. Not to mention, it also gives you the opportunity to actually get some conversations with an adult in during the day!
I would also highly recommend discovering a new hobby or side hustle. It really helped me to find my identity other than being just “mom”.
Plan your family’s meals
Let’s be real. Us stay at home moms have enough to keep track of during the day. Planning what to feed the family at the last minute isn’t what most of us want to be doing. Especially with demanding kiddos running around! Try coming up with a meal plan at the beginning of every week to keep yourself sane.
My husband and I sit down every Sunday night and come up with a game plan of what meals to prepare for the week.
Spend quality time with your children
Carve out a chunk of time in your hectic day to connect one on one with each of your children. This can be as simple as reading them a book, or doing some imaginative play.
I think it’s important to put your phone away during this time as well. It shows your child that they are your main focus. Plus it’s less tempting to quick peek at your phone when it’s out of sight.
Don’t rely too much on screen time
Although a little screen time never truly hurt anyone, try not to let it add up throughout the day. A quick Google search will show you many studies that have been done on how to appropriately give your child screen time!
When we started focusing on allowing less screen time for our toddler, he seemed to listen a lot better to us and play independently for longer.
Practice patience
It’s easy to forget that children aren’t able to regulate their big emotions like you and I do. Remember, most of your toddler’s frustrating actions are completely innocent. They are still learning how to correctly behave and they need you to teach them what is right and what is wrong.
Modeling patient behavior for your child will teach them how to be patient in return. However, if you do find yourself becoming impatient with your little ones try to focus on taking a step back and do some breathing exercises.
We’re all going to experience frustration with our children at one point or another. When I feel like I’m becoming increasingly impatient with my little one, I try to switch up the scenery and bring them outside to go for a walk. (When it’s not during the freezing Wisconsin winter of course).
Pick up toys before bedtime
Every night before your child’s bedtime try to get into a routine of cleaning up their toys. It’s a great way to teach them to become responsible and take care of their possessions. Waking up in the morning to a clean play area is a great way to start the day off on the right foot too!
I like to sing a clean up song with my toddler every night as we pick up his toys together. I try to make it fun and positive to avoid him protesting clean up time.
I hope you found a few tips that could be helpful for you! Being a stay at home mama is not for everyone, and that’s ok! It can definitely be a tough job, but at the end of the day, it is so worth it.
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